Valentine’s Day Is For Your Lover Not For Your Mama (EROS LOVE)

Celebrating Valentine’s Day, Hell Yeah!!!

February is here (Valentine’s day) and I am almost stifled by the red in every grocery or department store. From flowers to clothes, to assorted desserts and chocolate, to gift baskets, to balloons, to greeting cards, everything is RED! It’s in your face like bam! Shazam! And boy, do I love it???!!!

I love, love! Not agape love. I love that too but I mean eros love. Those of you who did not know there were different types of love now will be like, say what??? Yes, there are actually seven different types of love.

Seven Types of Love

  • Eros which is sexual, romantic or passionate love (Valentine’s day love);
  • Ludus which is playful or uncommitted love (Booty call, Nanga Mboko, Mapam);
  • Pragma which is practical love (in short to define this one is complicated but let me paint a scenario. You know how sometimes some people have arranged marriages or marry just because “how man go do” and not necessarily out of romantic (eros) love and over the years they develop a certain kind of love for the person which is much more practical than romantic love. That is pragma love. Like pragmatic love…get it? I’m not a psychologist, but that’s what I could come up with as an explanation. I tried my best I beg!).
  • Philia which is friendship love;
  • Storge which is familial love (parents and siblings);
  • Agape which is universal love; and
  • Philautia which is self-love.

Valentine’s Love is Eros Love

Okay, so back to my original chatter before I got sidetracked with telling you about the different types of love. I love Valentine’s Day and for those of you who just think it’s a day of love, no, it’s not. It’s a day of eros love specifically. Maybe Ludus and Pragma love too for all the “cunny” people out there but definitely not Philia, Storge, Agape or Philautia love. On that note, stop sending your parents Valentine’s Day cards! That’s creepy. I know Hallmark wants to milk this day to the maximum by making all sorts of greeting cards, but please, don’t fall for it.

Origin of Valentine’s Day

So, do you even know how Valentine’s Day came about? I asked one of my friends why she celebrates Valentine’s Day, she said she was taught by her Catholic Catechist that St. Valentine was the saint of love. He loved doing good deeds blah, blah, blah… so on Valentine’s Day, she uses the opportunity to show love to everyone from her husband to her kids, parents etc. and doing good deeds too. While that is somewhat true, it is not quite entirely true. Let me explain. True, St. Valentine is the saint of love but the story behind that will make you aware of the kind of love that he is a saint for. In fact, there is no clear history as to the origin of Valentine’s Day celebration so we are going to rely on what legend says. Clutch your pearls, take a deep breath, it’s so beautiful!

Valentine’s Day Legend 1

One legend contends that Valentine was a priest who served during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that bachelors made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he outlawed marriage for young men and required them instead to become soldiers. Fr. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied Emperor Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When Fr. Valentine’s actions were discovered, Emperor Claudius ordered that he be put to death. He died a martyr. For Love! Aww…

Valentine’s Day Legend 2

According to another legend, an imprisoned Valentine actually sent the first “valentine” greeting himself after he fell in love with a young girl–possibly his jailor’s daughter–who visited him during his confinement. Before his death, it is alleged that he wrote her a letter signed “From your Valentine,” an expression that is still in use today. Although the truth behind the Valentine legend is murky, the story emphasizes his appeal as a compassionate, brave and most importantly “romantic figure”.

Valentine’s Day Is For Your Lover Not For Your Mama (EROS LOVE)

So you see, this love we celebrate on Valentine’s Day is romantic love (eros love). Therefore, unless you are interested in someone romantically, you better not be wishing them Happy Valentine’s Day before some people start feeling like you are crushing on them.

Why Celebrate Valentine’s Day?

As for those who don’t see the need to celebrate Valentine’s Day, I say why not? Celebrate love. It’s a beautiful thing. Like I define it with a friend of mine, it is the feeling you feel when you feel the feeling you feel you have never felt before. When you feel this special feeling, by all means, you should celebrate it. Even if you love someone every day, Valentine’s Day is still worth celebrating! It’s like saying that you shouldn’t celebrate your birthday because every day is your birthday. Or that you shouldn’t celebrate your anniversary because every day is an anniversary. Wharisdat? Please o, if you are saying we should not celebrate Valentine’s Day because you don’t have a Valentine, you can curl up on the couch and watch a romantic comedy, with a box of tissue and dream of the day you will get your own.

Don’t be Unromantic and Cheap!

If you are an unromantic or lazy spouse or partner who just can’t be bothered to take the time and celebrate with your significant other, I would like to remind you that you are wasting St. Valentine’s death. Please don’t let the poor guy’s death be in vain. Meanwhile, if you are just a plain old cheap spouse or partner, who doesn’t want to spend on gifts, I will tell you that you don’t need to spend money to celebrate love. You just need Youtube and some good old Lionel Richie, Phil Collins, Ben Decca or Sam Mbende and you should be good to go! Unless you want to Keep up with the Kardashians and buy expensive gifts to front on social media. If that’s the case, I can only pray for you!


On that note, Wele Out!
Happy Valentine’s Day my Love!!! ♥

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